A Disease Called Society!
For starters, if you wouldn't know, I'm neither conservative nor orthodox but I certainly am culturally abound, thanks to the country that I live in and the values that are imbibed in me. If you are one of that, that I'm not, you are free to jump off my page right now, if not, welcome to my reading space. It is as free-spirited and liberated as my thoughts are. To say the least, I would believe so!
As much as I'm proud of being an Indian, I'm equally distraught over the stigma that is lingering free in the country through people's mindset and actions and reaction to a wave of things. As much diversified as we are , so much are we nurturing the least important states or ideas in our heads. And that is spilling all around us and the so-called "society".
Society (who ever coined this term, I'll spank him someday), this has been the most feared and influential aspect in most of our lives in some way or the other. Like it or hate it, there is always someone watching us, like a hawk! I definitely hate it. What caught me into thinking about an array of topics is related to things that I've experienced, have seen, read which only leaves me with a feeling of pity and at times, disgust.
I was watching a TV show in which one of the well known personalities in India said and I quote "Arranged marriages should be abolished as they are nothing but (sic) sex with a stranger." Well, as of date, a large proportion of marriages are arranged and will continue to be so because we as a country as not as advanced as our western counterparts. People are still not free to choose their partners for many a societal reasons and the ones who do so are mostly banished. This is what primarily happens in rural India. We always end up focusing on urban India as the real India during any discussion. As we know (but overlook at times), there is a striking difference between the two and the gap is so wide and large that an institution like marriage will continue to be dictated. May be, after almost a century or so, when I and you are all dead, can there be a ray of change. But who knows anyway! When marriage is a full time business, why would anyone be bothered about changing the norms? It is everybody's business! Ideally, marriage is bonding of two souls for life, where the families of those two souls come together, rejoice and bless them. There are only a few countable number of instances that have laid down the usual norms and gone the happy way. Now, that is not what is representative of the silent majority. Pragmatically, marriage is still preceded by dowry, benefits, favors and all things materialistic.The girl's family continues to bear the brunt when the groom's family is trying to make up for all the losses they have incurred in their stupid lives. And this ain't a happy unison but an agreement. With a situation like this, there is not even a remote possibility that arranged marriages can ever be abolished in this country. On the contrary, there are instances where arranged marriages do happen, mostly in urban India because you didn't find a suitable mate. But the saga of favours will continue. You are indebted for life! And with rural India, with education finding it hard to make way into people's minds, any kind of liberalisation is far-fetched. (Education! Another huge debatable topic in itself, some other time.) This to me, is the sticking giant monster which will prevail for a greater period. The Stigma!
Ever since the last census reports are out, there is an exhaustive debate over the skewed female:male sex ratio. This is bound to happen if every mother wants a son and not a daughter. Now, why not a daughter? Because of the expenses they would have to bear in the future. All this falls back to illogical rituals and practices since I don't know when. And now, the aftermath is such that so many women and girls are raped in some corner of the country, every single day. Some are voiced, many are not. If you are good at economics, you'll certainly look at it from the demand-supply perspective. No kidding, this is a humongous monster - the mindset. So many thousands of girl fetus were killed decades ago that we have a dirty reality in front of us today. What is that your boy will do that your girl will not or cannot? Isn't this a stigma?
Another monster that looms large is the divide amongst people called religion and caste. Oh my God!
"He belongs to X and she belongs to Y, how can XY be together? He belongs to X, I like him. Oh! He belongs to Y, ewwww! I want a girl who belongs to Y community only! My parents will not approve of X!" Somebody give these guys a BREAK! Its nothing but Absurd! Absurd! and Absurd! One thing that I could never understand is that what will these XYZs achieve in life by being proud of that they are XYZs anyway. For one second, (one second only!)let me hold onto the thought that I favour X or Y. All babies, in any part of the world, are born the same way, to women only. They aren't classified by Him as XYZ. As they grow up, their foreheads are tagged and they are branded. If the infants born to YY or XX are abandoned some day, do they get branded as Y orphans or X orphans or are they just orphans!? Aren't we all going to die at the end of the day? Why do people waste their time talking nonsense? Why do they fight? Is this, in any way, going to fuel the development of our country which is an utmost priority of every single citizen of this nation. I fear not! This, to me, is the worst stigma that this country has ever ever ever possessed!
A large majority of us are fuming over the racial discrimination that is meted out to our countrymen and women at different nations across the world. We take up rallies, march with candles, stand by in solidarity to show the world that we united and will not resist any kind of offensive behaviour. And what are we, a country full of diversified people with different colors. Every (almost every) boy wants to marry a beautiful girl and every (again, almost every) girl wants a handsome man. Are so many beautiful and handsome guys in production!?. No, no, this ain't a frustration I'm venting out. I'm way too comfortable in my skin. ;)
On a serious note, there is a distinctive discrimination that is rooted in our very country and we dare to stand up against others. I mean, we should, but how many of those marching with candles will settle for anything less than beautiful or handsome, is the question. To me, my friend, a person is beautiful only if the mind is beautiful enough. What's to do with color of the skin or race (keeping other nations in mind)?
With all these problems hovering above our heads(This is just a chunk of the problems that I wanted to publish in this note), we dream of a nation, so prosperous, so rich, so happy. We are still coming to terms with all the changes that are happening for the good (not an arranged marriage, here) - the ones that are challenging old useless customs and traditions, which does no good to anyone. I'm equally proud over the various cultures and traditions that this country upholds, as long as it doesn't harm anybody. As long as we take judicious decisions, why not celebrate it in as many ways as possible!
Above all, humanity is what wins!! It doesn't bother about religion, caste, color, race, money. It just matters that you exist in the best possible ways without any obligations or prejudice!
So, we still have a long way to go before our dream nation becomes a reality! Its not impossible though! :)
As much as I'm proud of being an Indian, I'm equally distraught over the stigma that is lingering free in the country through people's mindset and actions and reaction to a wave of things. As much diversified as we are , so much are we nurturing the least important states or ideas in our heads. And that is spilling all around us and the so-called "society".
Society (who ever coined this term, I'll spank him someday), this has been the most feared and influential aspect in most of our lives in some way or the other. Like it or hate it, there is always someone watching us, like a hawk! I definitely hate it. What caught me into thinking about an array of topics is related to things that I've experienced, have seen, read which only leaves me with a feeling of pity and at times, disgust.
I was watching a TV show in which one of the well known personalities in India said and I quote "Arranged marriages should be abolished as they are nothing but (sic) sex with a stranger." Well, as of date, a large proportion of marriages are arranged and will continue to be so because we as a country as not as advanced as our western counterparts. People are still not free to choose their partners for many a societal reasons and the ones who do so are mostly banished. This is what primarily happens in rural India. We always end up focusing on urban India as the real India during any discussion. As we know (but overlook at times), there is a striking difference between the two and the gap is so wide and large that an institution like marriage will continue to be dictated. May be, after almost a century or so, when I and you are all dead, can there be a ray of change. But who knows anyway! When marriage is a full time business, why would anyone be bothered about changing the norms? It is everybody's business! Ideally, marriage is bonding of two souls for life, where the families of those two souls come together, rejoice and bless them. There are only a few countable number of instances that have laid down the usual norms and gone the happy way. Now, that is not what is representative of the silent majority. Pragmatically, marriage is still preceded by dowry, benefits, favors and all things materialistic.The girl's family continues to bear the brunt when the groom's family is trying to make up for all the losses they have incurred in their stupid lives. And this ain't a happy unison but an agreement. With a situation like this, there is not even a remote possibility that arranged marriages can ever be abolished in this country. On the contrary, there are instances where arranged marriages do happen, mostly in urban India because you didn't find a suitable mate. But the saga of favours will continue. You are indebted for life! And with rural India, with education finding it hard to make way into people's minds, any kind of liberalisation is far-fetched. (Education! Another huge debatable topic in itself, some other time.) This to me, is the sticking giant monster which will prevail for a greater period. The Stigma!
Ever since the last census reports are out, there is an exhaustive debate over the skewed female:male sex ratio. This is bound to happen if every mother wants a son and not a daughter. Now, why not a daughter? Because of the expenses they would have to bear in the future. All this falls back to illogical rituals and practices since I don't know when. And now, the aftermath is such that so many women and girls are raped in some corner of the country, every single day. Some are voiced, many are not. If you are good at economics, you'll certainly look at it from the demand-supply perspective. No kidding, this is a humongous monster - the mindset. So many thousands of girl fetus were killed decades ago that we have a dirty reality in front of us today. What is that your boy will do that your girl will not or cannot? Isn't this a stigma?
Another monster that looms large is the divide amongst people called religion and caste. Oh my God!
"He belongs to X and she belongs to Y, how can XY be together? He belongs to X, I like him. Oh! He belongs to Y, ewwww! I want a girl who belongs to Y community only! My parents will not approve of X!" Somebody give these guys a BREAK! Its nothing but Absurd! Absurd! and Absurd! One thing that I could never understand is that what will these XYZs achieve in life by being proud of that they are XYZs anyway. For one second, (one second only!)let me hold onto the thought that I favour X or Y. All babies, in any part of the world, are born the same way, to women only. They aren't classified by Him as XYZ. As they grow up, their foreheads are tagged and they are branded. If the infants born to YY or XX are abandoned some day, do they get branded as Y orphans or X orphans or are they just orphans!? Aren't we all going to die at the end of the day? Why do people waste their time talking nonsense? Why do they fight? Is this, in any way, going to fuel the development of our country which is an utmost priority of every single citizen of this nation. I fear not! This, to me, is the worst stigma that this country has ever ever ever possessed!
A large majority of us are fuming over the racial discrimination that is meted out to our countrymen and women at different nations across the world. We take up rallies, march with candles, stand by in solidarity to show the world that we united and will not resist any kind of offensive behaviour. And what are we, a country full of diversified people with different colors. Every (almost every) boy wants to marry a beautiful girl and every (again, almost every) girl wants a handsome man. Are so many beautiful and handsome guys in production!?. No, no, this ain't a frustration I'm venting out. I'm way too comfortable in my skin. ;)
On a serious note, there is a distinctive discrimination that is rooted in our very country and we dare to stand up against others. I mean, we should, but how many of those marching with candles will settle for anything less than beautiful or handsome, is the question. To me, my friend, a person is beautiful only if the mind is beautiful enough. What's to do with color of the skin or race (keeping other nations in mind)?
With all these problems hovering above our heads(This is just a chunk of the problems that I wanted to publish in this note), we dream of a nation, so prosperous, so rich, so happy. We are still coming to terms with all the changes that are happening for the good (not an arranged marriage, here) - the ones that are challenging old useless customs and traditions, which does no good to anyone. I'm equally proud over the various cultures and traditions that this country upholds, as long as it doesn't harm anybody. As long as we take judicious decisions, why not celebrate it in as many ways as possible!
Above all, humanity is what wins!! It doesn't bother about religion, caste, color, race, money. It just matters that you exist in the best possible ways without any obligations or prejudice!
So, we still have a long way to go before our dream nation becomes a reality! Its not impossible though! :)
Comments
loved your writing and flair in the thought process....good one